That is a hard one...how do you love yourself, your family, and your community in solid healthy ways? One thing I have learned is that every family has issues, arguments, awkward moments, all the fun stuff.
So many people have let politics, religion, sexual identity, and various other lifestyle choices dictate the level of family communication we have with our loved ones. Learning to hold space for family who just "don't get us" or we "just can't talk" can really makes strong impacts on our lives. Here is the real info on that.
Forgive and make space. Time really does heal. Forgetting is not realistic. We have memories for a reason. Concentrate on your life, staying in your lane, building your empire. This gives everyone a chance to grow, and take responsibility for their own trauma and emotions. You will be surprised how much easier interactions with family will be.
Ask spirit to make conversations empowering and educational vs. defensive and argumentative. Ask spirit to take over during the conversation with said person or people. The key is to ask before the event or conversation when you are in a good place emotionally.
Understand that coming from the same family only means you share a bloodline. Your upbringing, perceptions, traumas,
and victories can be vastly different. Acknowledging and validating those differences will be hugely healing. This will greatly aid in your own healing.
Here is my advice on loving family. Hold loving space without putting yourself in direct line of abuse. Acknowledge and allow yourself and others to be human. Focus on yourself, your family, and your community, in that order. Wow, you will be surprised how easier life gets. Focus on what makes you feel good and loving. Switch your conversations and focus to the present, and the future. The past happened, everyone learned and created their own karma or dharma.
Acknowledge that when we choose our family we are choosing the team that will give us the characteristics, personality, and genetic makeup to pursue your lessons and life purposes; then move forward with those life purposes.
I hope this inspires you all whenever you read this.